Beauty in the Breakdown

in this life

This weekend, I lived a dream. A girl that used to babysit me, Allison Davis-Satterfield, also a professional photographer, let me shadow her for two days. We shot a wedding and then did pictures with Santa at a fancy country club. The first stop for the weekend was the beauty salon. My first photographer's tip? "Watch out for the hairdressers, they like their hairspray, and you don't want it on your lens." The next stop was the church for detail shots. The decorations were so pretty. We then went to the festival house, where the reception was to be held. We got a few pictures there, than headed back to the church to get pictures of the little parts that make up a wedding: rings, flowers, dress and shoes, etc. The best thing in the world is watching Allison lay on her belly under the desk in the Pastor's study to get the perfect angle of the dress hanging on the bookshelf. Next came the shoes and garter. She shot those on a table in a sunday school room, and you'd never notice. We went to do the rings and flowers, and I couldn't pass up taking this picture. The bouquet was so pretty, and I just had to snap one of my own. It was sitting on a changing table in the nursery. I showed Allison the picture and she told me the most meaningful thing she could ever say. She said, "That's when you know you're meant to be a photographer, Sara." By this, she meant that you can take something gross and make it beautiful if you have the right eye. You'd never be able to tell that picture was taken on a baby changing table. I've never been one that enjoyed taking pictures of objects, people are my "thing". I have never felt better about my photography than I did when Allison told me how good my work was. I was practically beaming, and my weekend couldn't have gone better. The lesson I learned? There's beauty in everything. Whether it be a baby table or an unhappy heart, there's always some good, somewhere. For example: well, a big example would be life. In life, things go wrong, yes, but do we ever stop and think of how much worse it could be? Yes, there are people that have it harder than you, but that's not what I'm getting at. When something goes wrong, you should step back and think of the good things that are happening at the exact same time. When the beautiful sun sets, it's a bit saddening, but there's always stars that follow.

Jesus Loves You, Pass It On!

in this life

This past weekend, I attended pilgrimage. It was one of the most moving experiences of my life. For those of you who don't have a clue what Pilgrimage is, I'll tell you. Pilgrimage is a compilation of sessions to bring you closer to God. The worship is contemporary, with the same band that plays at my summer camp called Breakaway.

Not everyone can enjoy contemporary worship, but I for one, absolutely love it. I felt the presence of God every day at Pilgrimage, and it is a truly amazing feeling. There was one girl giving her testimony, and it moved me greatly. She was in a wheelchair, unable to walk. Her story was so powerful, and it had such an amazing message, not even the speaker could top it. The one thing she said that stuck out to me the most was: "I may not walk on Earth, but I will someday walk on streets of gold." This made my jaw drop. How could a girl who was stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of her life have such a positive outlook? I now think about her and her testimony every time i get upset about one of my flaws, because my flaws are like spilled milk compared to what she is going through.

Another thing that I realized at Pilgrimage is that God loves us, and he loves us all. No conditions. He does not judge, and he cares more about us than anyone on the planet possibly can. Sometimes, people need a reminder. I am blown away at the wonders of the world each and every day, the way he paints the sky pink and orange every sunset takes my breath away. The way the stars hang perfectly together at night puts me in awe. The way the sun rises in the morning takes my breath away. These small things we take for granted, such as the smile of a small child, the laughter of a cancer patient, the hugs from your loved ones, or just an "I love you" from a friend, are so important, and taking a step back, i notice how I never really pay attention. Life is a gift, God didn't have t put you here. Never wish you were dead, because there's people out there that are dying to live. Instead, we should spread the love of God to out thirsty world, because we're pretty much in a spiritual drought. We need to stop worrying so much about satisfying others, and focus on satisfying God. Because after all, God is the one and only thing that will truly matter in the end.

At Pilgrimage, one youth group made clothespins that said, "Jesus Loves You! Pass It On." and pinned them on people that were not expecting it. They did it quietly, so the person would find it later, or have it pointed out by a friend. I thought this was one of the coolest ways of spreading God's love I'd ever seen, so I brought it home with me. I made eight clothes pins Sunday night, and distributed two to each of my friends that went to Pilgrimage with me. We put them on people's notebooks in their lockers, and today, i discovered that people were indeed passing the clothespins along. Personally, I clipped one of my best friends and a faculty member that I thought could use it. It's interesting to walk by people and overhear them telling their friends that they got a clothes pin in their locker from someone. It makes me smile to know that I could have made someone's day. So, if you're from my school, and you're reading this, yes, i started it. Don't be the one to finish it. Share God's word, Jesus Loves You, PASS IT ON! (:

THE GOLDEN RULE;

in this life

We all know what "The Golden Rule" states: "Treat others the way you want to be treated."

... So can someone please tell me why on earth it's so hard to do so? Being a high school student, I see kids get picked on and stereotyped every single day. So what if this guy likes to wear his jeans tighter than the other guys? So what if this girl doesn't talk to the popular kids and prefers to sit alone? So what if that kid actually cares about what the teacher has to say? I don't think it matters what you do with your hair, whether you wear glasses of contacts, or what brand your jeans are. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but we don't always have to voice it, especially if we don't think it through beforehand. Yes, it's easy to judge someone based on how they look, but until we really get to know someone, we can't really make a true judgement.

We all pick and choose our friends by people we have stuff in common with. That's natural. But who's to say that we can't be friends with completely opposite people? And if it's too difficult to make friends with people that aren't like you, why must you hate them? You can still like someone and not be their best friend.

I, for one, am not a fan of drama, and I know I'm not alone on that. So, why do people feel the need to degrade someone else just because they don't like them? Half the time, their reason for not liking that person is completely pointless. And because they don't like that person, they think that no one else should, just because. No one likes to have their feelings hurt, and if everyone treated people the way they want people to treat them, no one would be mean to each other, and I can almost guarantee that suicide levels would decrease drastically.

So, next time you judge someone, take a step back, and get a chance to know that person before you pin a bad name on them. If they are just what you labeled them to be in the first place, that's no reason to be mean to them. Be nice to everyone, for one good deed makes another, and pretty soon the world will be like a huge game of dominoes. (:

YOU CAN'T JUDGE A BOOK BY IT'S COVER;

in this life

everyone has their own private issues, whether it's a split family, the death of a parent, or something else. everyone has something they're embarrassed about. let me put it this way: when you're walking through the mall, and you see someone, you have this automatic judgement of them in your head, even if you have never seen them before. if you see a guy in baggy pants to his knees, an xxxxxxl tshirt, and his chain around his neck could reach his toes, you think, "thug". that guy could come out of a respectable home, and be valedictorian of his class. if you see a guy dressed in black pants with a black shirt, tons of piercings and tattoos, and long hair with a guitar on his shoulder, you'll automatically think, "gothic" or "punk", when that guy could be in a band that plays for the Lord. when you see a girl dressed head to toe in juicy couture and gucci clothes, you automatically think, "spoiled". when she could be working four jobs as a nineteen year old college student, paying for all she has. my point here is, you can't really know a person unless you get to know them. everyone deserves a chance. cliques form from teens liking the same stuff, and getting along. i bet the little girl with glasses and clothes that are two sizes too small is just as nice as the girl who gets all she wants from her rich parents. everyone needs a friend, and you don't need to pick your friends by what they wear, who they're friends with, what they wear, or how smart they are. you'll be surprised to find how many of those people that are "outcasts" are actually cool, just in a different package. it's kind of like a present. if you have a gift wrapped in sparkly paper, with a big bow on top, and a gift that's just stuck in a shoebox and wrapped in newspaper, odds are, you're going to pick the pretty gift first, because it looks nicer. what if there was a $100 bill in the shoebox, and a pair of socks in the pretty box? a lot of times, this happens because we judge whether or not we want to talk to someone by their outward appearance, and not by whether or not they have potential to be what you're looking for. so, talk to new people. invite them to sit with you at lunch. you never know how bad they need a friend right now.

Love,

sara (:

in this life

it's been forever, i know. but last night, i was talking to my friend marshall on skype, ans he told me about a song, by this band called "For Today". the name of the song is "Talmidim" which is hebrew for servant, or disciple. i like a lot of techno, powerpop, acoustic, alternative, and indie music, but i also enjoy some screamo and hardcore metal. this band is hardcore metal, but the song is softer than most of the songs they sing. the video is at the top, i strongly suggest listening to this song.

in this song, one of the band members recites a group of bible verses, and also makes a speech in his own words about how lucky we are to even be associated with God Almighty. the verses state:

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. You will live in the land I gave to your forefathers; you will be my people and I will be your God."

Ezekiel 36:26-28

this verse is so accurate to the feeling that i got when i gave my life to Christ. you feel cleansed and renewed, you feel like a new person, for you have a new heart. you have been given the chance to start all over, and leave all your sins in the past. God doesn't just wipe our heart clean once, but he forgives us every single time we ask for it. although we do not deserve it, he loves us, and he always will. no matter what we do, he will always love us, for we are his children, and he made us in his vision. the band member goes on to express his feelings in a speech during the song. it is honestly one of the most moving speeches i have ever heard in my life. he says:

"And through all of this, there is nothing, absolutely nothing, no fear, no insecurity, no doubt, no hesitation that will ever, ever stop us. Because we are the son of the living God. Because we are the children of the almighty. Because we are the residents of the kingdom of heaven and we are soldiers in an army of the immortal. And when we speak light, light happens. And when we speak healing, healing happens. And when we speak truth, truth happens. And when we go take what we found to a dead world, we will see it come to life again. When we take what we found to a hopeless world, we will see hope come back, we will see the hearts of our world start beating again and we will see the colour come back in peoples faces and absolutely nothing will ever stop that and mountains will move before us and oceans will pour before us and the dead will raise before us and the world will know that our God is a God that heals, that our God is a God that lives, that our God is a God that loves unlike anyone has ever felt before because we are fearless, because we are his hand, because we are his feet, forever and ever..."

i have never heard it put like this. everything he says is true. if you were to break it down, you'd get:

"And through all of this, there is nothing, absolutely nothing, no fear, no insecurity, no doubt, no hesitation that will ever, ever stop us. Because we are the son of the living God. Because we are the children of the almighty. Because we are the residents of the kingdom of heaven and we are soldiers in an army of the immortal."

this is saying, that through life and all its hardships, nothing will come between us and God. we are God's children, and we have our place reserved for us in heaven, because God wants us to live with him for all eternity. "we are soldiers in the army of the immortal" simply means that we go out and witness to people on God's side, to save them, and lead them home to their father, so that they may also have a space in heaven, to live forever in a perfect place, with no pain and no sorrow.

"And when we speak light, light happens. And when we speak healing, healing happens. And when we speak truth, truth happens. And when we go take what we found to a dead world, we will see it come to life again. When we take what we found to a hopeless world, we will see hope come back, we will see the hearts of our world start beating again and we will see the colour come back in peoples faces and absolutely nothing will ever stop that"

to me, this is saying, when we go out and tell of him and all his goodness, his goodness will be seen, and people will go to him. and when we tell of his stories, people will begin to understand, and believe these miracles that took place, and they, too will tell of the works of God. and when we take these stories and miracles out into this world of sin, people will then see that God is good, and begin to follow him, begin to live. and when the world lives in the name of God, then we will regain hope, and everything will be at peace, for we know that all we need is God. nothing can stop this, because the love of the Lord is stronger than any love there ever was, and ever will be.

"and mountains will move before us and oceans will pour before us and the dead will raise before us and the world will know that our God is a God that heals, that our God is a God that lives, that our God is a God that loves unlike anyone has ever felt before because we are fearless, because we are his hand, because we are his feet, forever and ever..."

these last words are saying, that once we bring this hopeless world to God, we will witness miracles, and God will heal us and forgive us for all that we have done, and he will show everyone that he is God, and nothing stands in the way of his power and his love. we will be fearless as long as he is with us, and we will become part of him, and live in paradise, FOREVER. <3

-i hope all of this made sense, there was so much that i got out of this song, it was just extremely hard to express it in words.

love yourself, and others will love you.

in this life

it's been forever since i last wrote. anyways, today was alright, we got a one hour delay at school, and i got some great extra sleep. i've found a new song that is now my favorite song. it's called "two is better than one" by boys like girls, featuring taylor swift. it's beautiful, and if you haven't heard it yet, i would strongly suggest looking it up. (:

anyways, if you've ever had a milk chocolate dove candy, you'd know that they say sweet things inside. i always get the big bag of them and read them for encouragement. today, i got a wrapper that really made my day. the quote on the wrapper said, "remind yourself that it's okay not to be perfect." this quote really changed me, because i constantly worry about being "good enough" for everyone. being a younger sibling is not easy, i know from experience. especially if your older sister was captain of the basketball, tennis, and softball teams, a member of all the clubs, an honor student, attended prom in eighth, ninth, eleventh, and twelfth grade, and even another prom in south carolina her senior year, homecoming queen, and the prettiest girl at the school. once she left, everyone looked to me like i was supposed to be a spitting image of her. sadly, i am no jessica bolton, and for the longest time, this bothered me every single day. getting called "jessica bolton's little sister" and "little bolton" finally wore off, and i'm in my junior year of high school. i have only been to one prom, and that was with a friend at a different school for his prom. i'm not as pretty as my sister, but i'm starting to resemble her more and more. i'm not an honor student, but i try hard in school. i just got on homecoming court for the first time this year, and i can only be voted queen my senior year, so that has yet to come. i've always done my best to measure up to my sister, and satisfy the rest of ridgecroft high school. but today, when i got that wrapper, it was like a slap in the face.

God didn't put me here to be just like my sister. she's all those wonderful things, but she's not perfect. for the longest time i had made her seem perfect in my eyes because i wanted to be just like her. no one is perfect but Jesus Christ, and i need not compare myself to anyone, because God made me to be me, not someone else. i'm slowly becoming more confident with myself, and i will soon be satisfied enough to be comfortable. i need to learn that everyone has someone they wish they could be like, and in the end, we'll never, ever be that person, so we need to accept it for what it is and be happy with who we are. short, tall, thick, thin, black or white. we're all unique and we're all wonderful creatures in God's eyes. my momma always told me, "don't be so down on yourself, 'cause God don't make no junk." that quote will always stick out to me, because i know that God didn't put me here to hate myself, but to make the best of my many blessings and embrace joys in this life i live. when i'm rattling all the things that are wrong with me, my mom points out, "when you say what you're dissatisfied with, you're pretty much spitting in God's face, because you're telling him he didn't do a good enough job on making you." God made us all in his vision, and we're all beautiful in his eyes. the next step is to be beautiful in our own eyes, and then we will be beautiful in the eyes of others.

QUOTE OF THE DAY// "It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes." -Sally Field

WE ARE FAMILY (:

in this life

today was a great day. i didn't realize how difficult it would be to keep up a blog on the weekends, it's pretty much impossible. my schedule stayed busy. cameron's shoot went especially well, (picture five) and the pictures with brian turned out perfect. (picture four and three) i did some senior environmentals for a girl in my school today named elizabeth, (picture two) and they went very well. after that shoot, i went to my cousin's engagement "tea party". being the small-town southern girl i am, this was my first "tea". i felt sort of out of place, but i ate eclairs, and they were delicious.

now that you know all my pointless information, i'll tell you what i learned. on saturday, i learned that there is someone out there for everyone, no matter who you are. today, i learned that there is nothing closer than family. that's what i'll touch on tonight. my grandparents from virginia came down to stay with us saturday night. my grandfather, wayne bolton, (picture one) is my absolute favorite person on this earth. every time i see him, i can't help but smile. he's such a great person, and he shows me how much he loves me every chance he gets, whether it's a kiss on the forehead or an "i love you". family should mean the most, and be above all others, because in the end, that might be all you've got. cherish moments you share with family, because no one lives forever. tonight, i will leave you with this: "The family is a haven in a heartless world." ~Attributed to Christopher Lasch

GOODMORNING :D

in this life

it's a beautiful day in m-boro! i'm staying over at cameron's house today, i spent the night here last night. sorry i didn't post a blog, but i was so tired and incredibly hyper. today we're gonna have a huge photoshoot and cameron's friend brian is coming over to take cute pictures with her. its gonna be a good day, because i love taking pictures. it's a perfect way to spend my day. i hope you enjoy our morning picture, i'll post some from the shoot when i write tonight. :D

QUOTE OF THE DAY// "Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad. -Norm Papernick"

everyone smiles in the same language

in this life

today was good. i'm not sure if i've mentioned this or not, but i love taking pictures. today, i had a photoshoot with a girl that graduated from my high school last year, named kristina. we got together after school, and it had been raining all day. i was so scared i'd have to cancel because of the humidity, but it dried up and was almost sunny by the last period of the day.

while taking her pictures, all i could think about was how pretty some people are, naturally. every girl i photograph is gorgeous, and it takes a toll on my self-esteem sometimes. there is a line between self-confidence and being conceited. i believe that in order to love and be loved, one must first love themselves. life is too short to worry about who has the best hair, or which girl gets asked to prom the most, or who wins homecoming queen. everyone has something beautiful about them, whether they see it or someone else sees it. i try to remind myself of this every single day. it's always nice to be complimented, and i make sure i throw some nice things out there every chance i get, because i love making people smile. so, i'll challenge you: whenever you may be reading this, the next time you go out, to school, work, or wherever, i want you to compliment as many people as you, can, and smile at everyone you come in contact with. you never know what your one smile can do. the quote i will leave you with tonight is from one of my favorite movies:

"Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day."

-Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

"Hold a true friend with both your hands." ~Nigerian Proverb

in this life

today, i was taught many, many things. all of them relate to friendship. my parents pointed out tonight that "you can't have more than one best friend." but, i disagree. i have about ten best friends. in my opinion, a friend is someone you talk to at school, call every now and again, and you spend little time with when necessary. but a best friend is someone you talk to every single day, someone who can make you laugh till you cry, someone you can call whenever you need to and you know they'll be there in an instant, kind of like our very own "minutemen". i have tons of friends, a few best friends, and i have one ashley davis. she is my number one in life, outside of family. she's been there since we met, and she's not going anywhere.

this afternoon, i came home from school, and then i went on a run with josh, one of those best friends. we're insanely out of shape, so we'd run a bit, then walk. as we walked, it started raining, but we didn't care. we had a long talk about friends and life, and it pretty much inspired tonight's blog. josh is having friend issues at the moment, but it'll get better. it's crazy to think about how fast friendships can end, because looking back, i hardly talk to any of my old friends. my best friends in middle school were different in elementary school, and my best friends in high school are not the same ones i had in middle school. i'm sure my college friends will be new, too. my mom always told me (you can tell i get tons of vital information from her and my dad) that in life, you might find one good friend if you're lucky. i've found mine, and a few more to go with it. , so i consider myself one of the luckiest girls alive.

losing friends is super hard to go through, because someone can mean a lot to you, and then walk out without warning. sometimes, we're at fault and don't realize it. friendship is a two way street. you can't be your own best friend.

i guess my main point in tonight's blog is that everyone needs someone, whether you're a friend, a best friend, or an ashley davis. without my friends, i don't know what i'd do. so, i'll leave you with this: "A true friend is one who thinks you are a good egg even if you are half-cracked." -Unknown

don't forget the "I LOVE YOU"

VALUE YOUR FRIENDSHIPS EVERY SINGLE DAY.

in this life

today was overall a good day. it started off with spilling coffee all over myself before i left home, but it didn't show up on my clothes, luckily. i got to school late, but my teacher didn't count me tardy. my best guy friend in my class is still sick, i found out today that he has strep throat. (if that's how you spell it, haha) now, i can focus on the good in today. my mom made soup and volcano biscuits, haha. it has cheese in the middle that she melts and it sort of erupts. but anyways, i'm actually going somewhere with this. my point in all of this random information is: no matter how bad things start off, you need to hang in there, because there's always something good to get out of it in the end. in my case, it was a volcano biscuit. another thing, cherish your friends and family, because you have no clue how short life is. my uncle's niece is in the hospital, and the family is having a meeting either tomorrow or thursday to decide whether or not they want to pull the plug. i have never had to experience the loss of someone close to me like that, thankfully. but, i really don't want to have to ever go through that. so next time you are around your friends, family, or just someone important, remind them what they mean to you. you never know what one simple "i love you" can mean to someone. i was having one of the worst days ever last week, and my mom kissed my forehead and said, "sara, you're my bright spot in the dark." those words made my day turn completely around, and i forgot all about my bad mood. i guess the quote i could tie in with this would be, "don't frown, you never know who's falling in love with your smile." -anonymous.

Monday, September 14, 2009

"Don't cry because it's over, but smile because it happened." -Dr. Seuss.

in this life

i've decided to start a blog, mainly to get my thoughts out at the end of everyday and vent, but also to give people a chance to relate to what i'm going through. i'll probably post pictures from time to time, but only if i take a good one, or find a good one for that day. anyways, today was pretty blah. i was in a bad mood, and i wasn't feeling well. although the day was not wonderful, tonight was better. i got a bubble bath, and then my friend kevin sang me the song he wrote me. that pretty much made it all better, and ended my night good. goodnight <3